When my doctor asked me about what I did yesterday, I told him about my day: "Well, yesterday afternoon, I waded across the edge of a lake, escaped from a mountain lion in the heavy brush, marched up and down a mountain, stood in a patch of poison ivy, crawled out of quicksand, and jumped away from an aggressive rattlesnake." Inspired by my story, the doctor said, "You must be an awesome outdoorsman!" "No," I replied,"Just a shitty golfer."
